Saturday, July 30, 2011 :::

hippos love cabbage

the only time (The Only Time - Pretty Hate Machine) reminds me of the bf.
do you know the lyrics?
I know it's lame, but I promise, the first time I kissed him properly I heard part of it in my head:
i swear
i just found everything i need
the sweat in your eyes the blood in your veins are listening to me
well i want to wrap it up and swim in it until i drown
my moral standing is lying down

I keep waiting to feel more... detached?
I guess I am just surprised at our current situation.
I feel kind of like I've accidently developed feelings for a fuckbuddy.
does that make sense?
like, we're still friends... just with a few perks now.
maybe I've always loved him, just I never paid attention to what kind of love until now.

it's actually really great.
a few nights ago we played drunken tekken that ended with a drunken make out session when I trekked to the fridge for more red bull. it was bizarre and I loved it.
probably tmi, but this is my blog after all.
is there a polite way to say he rocks my world?
it's how I felt about the snickerdoodle thing - betrayed by everyone who had known about them and not shared the knowledge with me.
how could he not tell me for so long? I started dating about 15 years ago, and I feel like I have wasted every minute of that time.
I know it sounds harsh, but isn't your SO supposed to be your best friend?
is that what's been wrong for every relationship I've been in?

I'm sure this is just the newness, but it seems everything we do together is also something I enjoy doing on my own.
I dunno how much of it is him just humoring me, and I'm even more concerned that he's trolling me, but I think he is fucking amazing.
I said I'd make it public in august, and it's about here.
I'll be surprised if it does turn out he's making it up, and I'll deserve to get torn up for it.
but we spend huge amounts of time together and it seems like he enjoys himself.
I keep telling myself this will change once school starts - it's how I'm rationalizing not rationing the time we spend together.
for now, though, I'm gorging myself on him.
ds9, wow, movies, lunch and dinners, sometimes breakfast... he even went to see the tekken movie with me and my sister!
this is the best summer I've ever had.

I know the fall will be devastating, but it's so easy to be happy with him.

I am pretty amused about my lack of posts lately.
I went from not posting because I was bummed all the time,
to not posting because all I'll do is talk about how great things are.

speaking of great!
there are these potato empanadas... they are heavenly.
we've been buying the frozen ones filled with potato mush and cheeses.. and omg...
seriously y'all have got to try some.

::: posted by tinafish at 1:01 AM :::

Monday, July 25, 2011 :::

those bastards!

cabbage and I went to outback for dinner...
... and sweet potato fries are back ^_^

(they didn't email me to tell me, so who knows how long I've been missing out on them)

::: posted by tinafish at 10:38 PM :::

Monday, July 18, 2011 :::

poopy bath water

do you ever look back and think,
.oO(what is the worst day of my life?)

the last 24 hours have been up there for me.

::: posted by tinafish at 8:38 PM :::