Friday, October 10, 2003 :::
My nurse manager now, the same d00d who used to by my charge nurse, said that if I wanted to go back to full time that I could. Thing is, it's so so sooooooooo hard making the switch from being awake all day and then being awake all night. So I'm trying to find a part time job sometime during the day.
I don't want to wait tables or anything, so I'm kinda leaning towards working somewhere at a job kinda like the one I have now - sit in front of a comp and answer phones and such. I only have school on Mondays and Wednesdays, so I'm hoping maybe I can work something out.
I seriously need more cash though. I'd planned on using this refund check for stuff I want: a new phone, an ipod, a gym membership, new clothes, you know... stuff like that. But now it looks like I'll be saving at least $700 of it in case my financial aid for next semester doesn't work out. And I've gotta give David $500 since I'd rather pay him back and be broke than feel like I owe him. And he needs it now too. Things with his loans and stuff have kinda gone to hell so both he and I are getting concerned about how we're gonna pay for school.
My eye hurts. My left eye is kinda red and hurts when I blink. I'd go to my doctor's office but apparently they think I didn't pay them the last time I was there. I dunno why... I'm gonna have to go through my checkbook and find the carbon copy of that check to show them. It's kinda funny. I never use checks... I'm on the same checkbook now that I was using back around easter, when I was having all those nosebleeds and stuff.
I seriously hope I can get another job. Just something part time, to bring in an extra couple of hundred dollars. I guess I shouldn't really care what I do, since most likely I won't have this same class schedule next semester so I'll be quitting around the time the Spring Semester starts.
I told one of the secretaries here that I'd work for her on Monday night - only 4 hours but still that's a little extra cash.
*sigh*
And I'm depressed too. My ex kinda laid out the question... asking if I still love him. What a ridiculous question. Of course I love him. Love doesn't go away. Seems kinda funny he should ask. Of all people I thought he understood that. I dunno if David understands that. I think maybe he feels a little threatened by all this that's going on. There's a reason that my ex and I aren't together anymore, so I dunno why he's worried. And on the other hand I sure never meant to hurt my ex. *sigh* I'm just so torn btwn still wanting what's best for him and then trying to be happy myself. I've never been so happy as now that I am with David.
I've sat here staring at that last sentence for a few minutes. It's the truth.
::: posted by tinafish at 5:36 AM :::