Sunday, June 19, 2005 :::
and I found this card that talks about duct tape... I'm really stoked about it, and I'm pretty sure my dad'll like it.
this is the first father's day I'll be spending with him; usually he spends the weekend in whatever part of the state my brother happens to be in.
honestly I'm a little nervous, but it's just an early dinner that we're going to.
this is the first time that I've worn makeup since my sister's bday (back in april) and I've even wearing my hear down.
still jeans and a tshirt, though... and combat boots.
it's not my fault, though. well it is, but there's nothing I can do about it now - I've gained so much weight that nothing but the jeans I bought after david & I broke up fit.
kinda embarrassing to admit, but oh well.
also, the connection here seems to be doing loads better.
last night I pinged yahoo - with 45% lost.
today when I pinged yahoo there was only 1% loss.
I'm pretty happy now, instead of constantly annoyed, so it's safe to chat with me once again.
I slept for almost 17 hours straight last night/this morning... I actually woke up around noon and didn't feel groggy at all.
kudos to me for finally working out my sleep; I've been screwed pretty much since 2 weeks ago.
and I'll leave you with this - they lyrics to my favorite song from nin's with teeth - getting smaller (
) getting a little erratic here
and I don't know who to trust
I guess they got a way of reading my mind
I guess I got to adjust
I got my arms that flip flop flip flop flip
I got my head on a spring well
well I thought I got you on my side
I haven't got fucking anything
I'm just a face in the crowd
nothing to worry about
not even trying to stand out
I'm getting smaller and smaller and smaller
and I have nothing to say
it's all been taken away
I just behave and obey
I'm afraid I am starting to fade away
I kind of see out the cracks
when I press up to the wall
I'm not looking to stand up real high
I'd be happy to crawl
I think I'm losing my grip
but I can still make a fist
you know I still got my one good arm
that I can beat that I can beat myself up with
I'm just a face in the crowd
nothing to worry about
not even trying to stand out
I'm getting smaller and smaller and smaller
and I have nothing to say
it's all been taken away
I just behave and obey
I'm afraid I am starting to fade away
hey and for what it is worth
I really used to believe
that maybe there's some great thing
that we can achieve
and now I can't tell the difference
or know what to feel
between what I've been trying so hard to see
and what appears to be real
fading away fading away fading away fading away
my world if getting smaller every day
hey hey hey hey
and that's ok
::: posted by tinafish at 1:12 PM :::