Wednesday, March 31, 2004 :::

I could have taken it!!!

I just got to Daybreak... and...

*shaking head*
he is just too trusting...

::: posted by tinafish at 8:28 PM :::

Tuesday, March 30, 2004 :::

so I'm a d00d?

lol. I thought that was hilarious.
I'm here at school... hitching a ride w/ AJ 'till I can figure something out. He's being ~incredibly~ awesome by bring me to school and taking me home. He ends up getting here about an hour and a half earlier than he needs to, and staying for about 3 hours later than he has to.
He's the awesomest.
I dunno what I'd do without him.

Also, I got my philo test back today. Check my Moblog for pics of what he did to my 10 page paper, and you can see my grade.
Well I'm gonna surf a bit more before heading to my next class.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:44 PM :::

Monday, March 29, 2004 :::

"if we run, he'll kill us"

yeah these last few posts are kinda... dumb.
That's my absolute favorite line from the movie!

::: posted by tinafish at 11:04 PM :::

"Man-animals don't fly!"

lol. I'm sitting here watching Battlefield Earth on the SciFi channel w/ my buddy Forsaken (on the net, not irl). Well, we're both watching tv, but he's in Podunk (I don't remember the name of the town, but it's some small town around here) and I'm here in Lubbock.
Stargate Monday is over (obviously) so here I am watching this.
I can't really move anywhere, since it hurts to walk.
I ended up having to crawl to the bathroom.
I will be unable to forgive David for leaving me here in this invalid state...
... unless he brings me some Pistacchio Almond Ice Cream.

::: posted by tinafish at 10:45 PM :::


so I was trying to convince David to stay here to watch Stargate SG-1. I grabbed his arms and threw one leg around his leg, and was trying to throw my other leg around his other leg.
I hit the corner of the everpopular coffeetable with the face of my foot!
And David has ~no~ ice!!! He runs to the fridge - I guess to bring me a fishstick or something! lol!
So I'm sitting here pretty much SOL w/ tears in my eyes.
David finally finds a bandage for my to wrap my foot... it's one of those brown stretchy sticky bandages.
Anyway. It's been about an hour since that happened. David left.. oh about half an hour ago.
So I'm sitting here watching Stargate alone. I decide that since my foot isn't hurting too much anymore, and since I kinda need to use the toilet I decide to trek to the bathroom.
Big mistake.
I end up sprawled on the floor not 5 feet from the couch writhing in pain.
*shaking head*
I'm gonna go back to watching Stargate!

::: posted by tinafish at 9:15 PM :::

Sunday, March 28, 2004 :::


trying to ftp...

::: posted by tinafish at 5:58 PM :::

Squishy's Party

here are a couple of pics:


His cake

Our cake

David cooking

New Jammies!

A Pooper Scooper!

Lucky & David cutting our cake

Squishy, David, & Me cutting our cake

well that's all for now!
I'll see about finding the video of us singing Happy Birthday to Squishy!

::: posted by tinafish at 2:14 PM :::

"I love you."

It was late at night... snow falling.
I'd never seen snow falling out of the sky.... I'd barely seen snow on the ground.
As I walked out of his apartment the snow flakes hit my face. It was cold, and he gave me his sweater.
I was laughing like an idiot, intoxicated by the snow or his attention... or both.
He grabbed his camera and I grabbed his dog. Down the stairs the three of us ran... laughing and dancing in the snow.
He shivers, so I stop at my truck. I grab my jacket and return his sweater.
He stops me with that look in his eyes... with that look on his face. He takes my arms and stares into my eyes.
"I love you."
The whole world fades away to black. Just me, him, and the snow falling.
I hug him and whisper into his ear:
"I love you too."

::: posted by tinafish at 1:27 AM :::

Friday, March 26, 2004 :::

jobless in lubbock

I got fired.
They said it was 'cause I violated the confidentiality agreement. I don't agree.
I'm gonna read my archives.
I'm not sure how I feel.

Squishy's party is starting in a few mins. I'll post some pics and stuff.

::: posted by tinafish at 8:42 PM :::

Wednesday, March 24, 2004 :::

My Squishy Wishy!!!

Here's what my sis got Squish to wear to his party:

isn't he just too cute?!?

::: posted by tinafish at 8:06 PM :::

I ~hate~ fedex!

I got home from school today and there was a package left on the porch by FedEx.
I looked at the box. Big yellow sticker that said "PERISHABLE" and a big green sticker that said "THIS WAY UP! CAKE INSIDE."
So I tried to get David to call FedEx to complain for me.
It didn't happen.

::: posted by tinafish at 4:03 PM :::

Monday, March 22, 2004 :::

Clavado en un Bar

Clavado En Un Bar

Aqu� me tiene bien clavado
soltando las penas en un bar
brindando por su amor
aqu� me tiene abandonado
bebiendo tequila pa� olvidar
y sacudirme as� el dolor

D�nde est�s bendita
d�nde te has metido
abre un poco el coraz�n
deja amarte coraz�n
ven y s�came de este bar

S� que te buscan demasiados
que te pretenden cantidad
pero eso no es felicidad
y mi amor nunca se raja
y mi amor nunca
jam�s te va a fallar
nunca jam�s

D�nde est�s maldita
d�nde te has metido
abre un poco el coraz�n
deja amarte coraz�n
ven y s�came de este bar

Estoy clavado, estoy herido
estoy ahogado en un bar
desesperado en el olvido amor
estoy ahogado en un bar
muy desesperado, muy en el olvido
estoy ahogado en un bar

D�jate querer amor
quiero ser tu todo
y tu coraz�n
ven a rescatarme amor

Yo quiero ser tu sol
yo quiero ser tu mar

Aqu� me tiene embriagado
llorando de rabia en un bar

Brindando por su amor

::: posted by tinafish at 10:50 PM :::

nadar� sin descansar

I am here at Aromas reading up for my philo test. I did not realize I needed to have read the whole chapter.
David is the awesomest bf. He just bought me a cinnamon roll.
Oh I just remembered - I take it back he is an aweful bf. He is going to be late for Squishy's bday party!

So anyway... must finish reading now.

::: posted by tinafish at 7:15 PM :::

Sunday, March 21, 2004 :::

it's party time!

View my Moblog for pics!

David forgot to take the camera so we ended up taking pics w/ our phones! It was aweful!
Some people from work were there... We had a good time.
David beat me at air hockey, then my nephew beat him... then I beat my nephew... then my nephew beat me... then I beat my nephew... then my nephew beat my sister... it was great.
My mom was in town for a bit... she stopped by. Turns out a cousin of my was found dead. Rather complicated story, really.
After the party we went by David's mom's to take her and her husband some cake... we stayed there for an hour or so just chatting.
Then we stopped by David's office to set up some stuff for tomorrow. I took some pics of some displays I saw there.
I'm gonna go to sleep now.

::: posted by tinafish at 11:38 PM :::

ooh I'm so excited!

I can't decide which one to buy!!!

here's the skin I have now:

thing is that wasn't supposed to be pink - it's supposed to be orange.

::: posted by tinafish at 3:21 AM :::


I slept all day today!
Well that's not true. Whenever I got home this morning Squishy was not in good shape. He had bumps all over his little body and his little private areas were swollen and red.
So off to the vet we go. I called ahead and made an appt for 0800. This time David went with me. Poor David - he couldn't hardly stand it when the tech was checking Squish's temperature.
They gave him a shot of prednisone, and some oral meds and a topical creme. The doc said that if Squish was still having this problem to take him back and they'd test him for allergies.
My poor squishy. On the bright side at least he's doing better now. No more bumps and he's running around again good as new.
So when we got back Squishy was back to his playful self. I hope he's all better for his party next week.
Then I went to bed and slept ~all~ day. I woke up @ ~ 1500 and returned some phone calls, then went back to sleep 'till 2100 or so.
And it was glorious sleep. No bad dreams or anything.
Well MARs are printing up. After I'm done w/ them I think I will jack w/ my site for a while... I really need to get past the whole empty page.
wish me luck!

::: posted by tinafish at 1:34 AM :::

Saturday, March 20, 2004 :::

david needs to go to sleep

::: posted by tinafish at 3:21 AM :::

Friday, March 19, 2004 :::

breath in, breath out

so my bud Javier brought me a "calm down" bag - filled with chips, powdered donuts, reese's peanut butter cups, honey roasted peanuts, Cadsbury creme egg, mt dews, and a magazine.
he is ~the~ awesomest!
here's a pic of the bag:

I've calmed down since that last entry... Just when I got to work this whole station was a mess. The cartridge in the printer needed to be changed, the fax machine was out of paper, there were labs scattered around everywhere... I just wanted to scream. I've had the chance to clean up and such, so things aren't so bad now.
Just with the way I've been feeling - hot and sweaty and so so tired - I was swinging btwn just wanting to sit here and cry to wanting to stand on the counter and scream.
But like I said... I feel a lot better now.
I'm gonna stuff charts and then work on the ever-popular philo test that was due 2 weeks ago.
I wish I wasn't such a procrastinator.

::: posted by tinafish at 11:59 PM :::


I am on the verge of having a nervous breakdown!!!

what the hell is going on?!?

::: posted by tinafish at 11:31 PM :::

fitful sleep if any at all

I have not been sleeping well.
It is extremely hard to fall asleep, and when I do sleep it is either very shallow where I'm more awake than asleep or I have vivid nightmares.
It's to the point where I am afraid to go to sleep. I am not sure what to do.
I'm tired.
At least I have to work tonight.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:04 PM :::

I got cancelled!

I didn't have to go to work tonight... I guess census is still really low.

I wish I knew what Squishy is allergic to. We went through and cleaned up pretty much everything. I dunno what it is, though. I went to Walmart to buy him some benadryl, only he's still got those bumps on his little body. I bought the syrup in hopes that he'd lick it up, but he didn't want to. I ended up having to soak the benadryl up with bread to get him to eat it.

Farscape is on. I'm not sleepy.

::: posted by tinafish at 3:59 AM :::

Thursday, March 18, 2004 :::

Squishy is sick!

Oh no! My Squishy Wishy is having some sort of allergic reaction!
A couple nights ago we noticed he had some bumps on his little nose! Only thing - it was after midnight when we noticed. I decided if he was still like that in the morning I'd take him to the doc. It was gone by morning.
Then this morning when I woke up he had bumps on the sides of his little cheeks and lips and stuff. I called the vet to make an appt then took a shower.
When I got out of the shower the bumps on his face were mostly gone but he had bumps all over his little body!
So I ended up being a walk-in 'cause I didn't wait for the time I scheduled his appt.
The vet gave him a shot of benadryl so he's fine now, only I wish I knew what he was reacting to.
A couple of weeks ago david was getting hives - we decided from the laundry detergent he uses.

So anyway... My dad's gonna bring David's dryer over here in a few... my sis is here and we're watching The Incredible Hulk - the old tv series.
Ooh! David's here for lunch!

::: posted by tinafish at 12:36 PM :::

Squishy's Bday

I'm looking at cakes for Squishy right now...
I had planned on having his party on the 24th - Wed, but I don't think his cake will be ready in time. looks like I'm gonna have to push it back to Saturday.
I'm still gonna try and do something special for him on Wednesday - since that's his actual bday.

Can you believe Lucky's never had a party?

::: posted by tinafish at 8:56 AM :::

Wednesday, March 17, 2004 :::


hope everyone has a safe one!

::: posted by tinafish at 10:18 PM :::


I forgot to mention while at WalMart we bought 2 20 oz bottles of Pepsi!!

::: posted by tinafish at 12:52 PM :::

/me yawns

so I'm still awake. I just finished going through my favorites (I started this afternoon but got sidetracked when my sis came by) and I'm gonna C&V something off Nicc's blog here after my spiel.
BoB is calling me everyday - that's more than he called when we were dating. I don't find it annoying, just he's so concerned about breaking this newfound friendship of ours that he's calling everyday and worrying that I'm mad or something.
One of my best friends - Mike - called me today. I hadn't talked to him in a week or so... but things are still good btwn us. I hope someday BoB can have that sort of familiarity w/ me.
My sis came by and we played video games for a couple of hours. We played some Soul Calibur 2 & Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance. When it comes down to it we're both Tekken fans, though. We're both pretty bummed about the broken Tekken Tag game. The kids are coming into town this weekend... Pabs is gonna have a bday party on the 21st.
Also, Squishy will be 1 on the 24th. I'm planning a bday party for him... I'm probably gonna have it at the park in front of my house or maybe at David's. It'd be awesome if I could get a cake made for him that he could eat. I'm not sure what I'm gonna get him.
So anyway. Here's the C&V:

Bill did it so I'm doing it too, because he's one of the cool kids, and they're all doing it too...

Firsts and Lasts.

First job: My first real job was tech support for msn. I did some modeling bits before, though.
First screen name: LaGoose27 - and that's what I still use
First self purchased CD: I remember my brother took me to buy my first cd - Dwight Yoakum, Just Lookin' For a Hit
First piercing/tattoo: my ears done.. repeatedly over the years
First true love: BoB
First enemy: Chrissy C. (I remember her full name but I'm sure that just wouldn't be nice)

Last big car ride: to Houston over Christmas Vacation
Last kiss: a few mins ago
Last library book checked out: I have ~no~ idea
Last movie seen: we just watched About Schmidt
Last beverage drank: Water
Last food consumed: Tyson's Honey BBQ Buffalo Wings
Last phone call: home: BoB; work: Dr. Overlie (funny how I remember that)
Last CD played: Eminem Show
Last annoyance: Squishy & Lucky have not been getting along lately
Last pop drank: Pepsi!!!
Last ice cream eaten: Pistacchio Almond
Last time scolded: I'm sure it was today
Last shirt worn: a red cookie monster tshirt

I AM: awake
I WANT: Slim in 6
I HAVE: a mac
I WISH: my life had a purpose
I HATE: cleaning
I FEAR: close-minded people
I HEAR: the Xfiles theme song & David typing
I SEARCH: for Timbuk2 sleeves
I WONDER: what side Heisenberg was really on
I REGRET: not staying on target
I LOVE: David
I ALWAYS: procrastinate
I AM NOT: in shape
I DANCE: with myself *singing*
I SING: now!
I CRY: when I hurt

YES or NO:
YOU HAVE A SECRET YOU HAVE NOT SHARED WITH ANYONE: no one knows everything about me

DO YOU...?
THINK YOURE A HEALTH FREAK: rofl. 'fraid not

COLOR: purple
DAY: Saturday
SONG(S): Bitch, Meredith Brooks; Dream On, Eminem; Pictures of You, The Cure; Helm's Place, Billy McLaughlin; Sunglasses at Night, Corey Hart; Just Another Day in Paradise, Phil Vassar; Sinner, Drowning Pool; and a few more...
SEASON: summer
DRINK: Mountain Dew


CRIED? yeah
SAID 'i love you'?: yes
WRITTEN A REAL LETTER: I emailed a real letter...
WRITTEN IN A JOURNAL?: I'm blogging now
MADE A GIRL MOAN? um... no.

So anyway... gonna chat w/ nicc now.

::: posted by tinafish at 1:55 AM :::

Monday, March 15, 2004 :::

View my Moblog

::: posted by tinafish at 12:06 PM :::


I had to guess what time I was writing that last post... I fell asleep on the couch before I posted it.
I just woke up about an hour ago... I slept forever!
So anyway... Spring Break is here!
I'm gonna lounge for the rest of the day!

::: posted by tinafish at 9:20 AM :::

Sunday, March 14, 2004 :::

*rubbing belly*

I just ate some buffalo wings. David's such a sweetie - he renewed his Sam's membership so I could buy those buffalo wings.
He's such a sweetie.

::: posted by tinafish at 1:46 PM :::

View my Moblog

::: posted by tinafish at 1:38 PM :::

Good Eatin' & the Headless Chicken

::: posted by tinafish at 3:53 AM :::

more tests

The Pick-up Test:
What's up frigidaire. You are 25% pickup-able! You're cold and unapproachable, like a big glacier that's unapproachable. And cold. Unlike the Arctic tundra, few even venture to plant their flag in you. You're definitely not a Scorpio, unless you were born between October 23 and November 21. The bad news is that you'll end up miserable and alone, probably knitting doilies out of cat hair. The good news is that this is apparently what you want. Honestly, I don't even feel comfortable talking to you right now, so I'm just gonna go? yeah? wash my friend's hair.
people more pickup-able than you (95%)
people just as pickup-able as you (0%)
people less pickup-able than you (3%)
Based on the 1,884,867 submissions before you.

lol. That reminds me of that time I was at Dicks w/ the people I worked w/ when I lived in Houston. They gave me a balloon to put on my head that said "Ice Queen" on it.

::: posted by tinafish at 3:04 AM :::

Saturday, March 13, 2004 :::

View my Moblog

::: posted by tinafish at 7:34 AM :::

*wiping sweat off brow*

I ~finally~ added captions for all the pics on my Moblog.
It took aaaaaaaaages.
Stop by and be enlightened by my captions!

::: posted by tinafish at 4:47 AM :::


I'm taking tests on tonight. I shall post my results here.

The Personality Test:
(Submissive Introvert Abstract Feeler )
Like just 11% of the population you are a DREAMER (SIAF)--reserved and imaginative. You are basically the shy, silent type. You don't have much interest in facts and figures or most of what's going on around you, but the internal worlds you build for yourself are rich and complex.
Luckily, your creativity and strong heart mean you have a deep personality evident to anyone who gets to know you. It's just that not many people do, because most everyone thinks you're a loser. Talk to yourself less, other people more, little shaver.
Interesting facts about the PERSONALITY TEST:
9,817,011 people have taken TheSpark's Personality Test.
41% of them are male, 59% of them are female.
The most common personality type is the Guru (SEAF).
The rarest is the Businessman (DECT). Only 3% of all test takers fall into that category.
Women prefer Shakespeare.

OkCupid Test:
The Sonnet
Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLDf)
Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed?
Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They're conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that's okay, because you're very choosy with your affections anyway. You'd absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance.
Your exact opposite:
Genghis Khunt - Random Brutal Sex Master
Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You're already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there's no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so.
You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls.
ALWAYS AVOID: The 5-Night Stand, The False Messiah, The Hornivore, The Last Man on Earth
CONSIDER: The Loverboy

I'm gonna talk to r00 for a bit now...

::: posted by tinafish at 3:29 AM :::

bored at work (as usual)

I thought this article was interesting...
I'm probably just gonna surf around tonight. One side of the unit is closed so it's gonna be cake tonight. Just I'm ~so~ sleepy...

::: posted by tinafish at 2:00 AM :::

Friday, March 12, 2004 :::

the glory that is a buffet

I was so out of it when I made that last post I forgot to mention the highlight of the day!
Apparently you can get as many drinks as you want with the breakfast (and possibly all other) buffet(s) at Golden Corral!
I could order coffee, tea, water, orange juice, apple juice, coke, dr pepper... and all fo $6.88!!!
yes this is a great day.

We're supposed to rent some movies and have lasagna tonight... We were supposed to start @ 1800, but I've still not heard from David.

::: posted by tinafish at 6:15 PM :::

I smell like smoke!

I just got back from Speeds. I was there with the guys. We ate at Golden Coral w/ some nurses from E4 then went on to play some pool.
I'm so tired.
I'm still not in the mood to do my philo paper.
There's some game we were playing last night... I need to find it to play again.
I've been looking into some data transfer cords for my comp.
The ipod is back - I need to work on the whole itrip software so I can listen to it on the way to school.
BoB is having some issues with stuff... I'm trying to give solid advice, but truth be told I don't think I'm in any situation to be giving advice.
I bought a pineapple upside down cake from Jodie's bake sale. I've given it to david 'cause he's such an awesome guy.
I'm gonna shower and then go to bed.
smoke is gross.

::: posted by tinafish at 11:01 AM :::

Wednesday, March 10, 2004 :::


I just found my keys!
I�m such the idiot!
they were in my bag the whole time!
david will be impossible to live with.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:35 PM :::

'cause I'm in love with the devil...

so I'm here at aromas listening to 16 Volt and trying desperately to work on my philo test.
It's not happening.

how 'bout I sing to all of ya'll?
*singing and dancing around in underwear*

It's become apparent
In my head the little machine
In the light I'm quite transparent
In the dark I'm such a dream
There are two sides to me
Sometimes I set the evil one free
'Cause I'm in love with the devil
And she's in love with me
And I go and I go away
Sometimes I lose myself
Sometimes in a bad way
It's never ending I'm going to hell
As long as you go with me
When you're down you'll only want it more
Isn't it nature to break somebody's heart
And I go and I go away
I won't treat you wrong
And I won't treat you bad
And in my eyes tonigh
And if you're all alone
I will be your only

*catching breath*
Yeah, that's from that video game Primal.

Well I'm gonna go back to trying to work on my philo test.

::: posted by tinafish at 8:38 PM :::

F1 and F2

I made that post last night at Aromas. I'd meant to really blog, but I was sitting at the same table as F1 and F2. David was sitting directly behind me with Chris at a different table. I was really glad I sat with the guys and not w/ the bf & the sidekick. They can be ~so~ boring.
Thing is, F1 has a really funny way of not hearing what you're saying. He always ends up asking something like, "what about my breast?" His little brother, F2, is a good guy. Out of all three of the bros, F1 is the really funny one, F2 is the cool one (someone who I'd choose to be a friend), and F3 (their older brother) is just too serious. But I like them all a lot. They're some really good guys.
We spent the evening talking about a few odd topics... we talked about commercials, infommercials, tea, pajamas, studying habits, david's new car, david's computer, squishy chewing things up... just real random things. When we were talking about squishy chewing things up I mentioned the power cords (both mine & david's), the ethernet cord, the firewire cable, and also his sock fetish. F1 went on to talk about his dog, and how she likes socks too. Then he says something like, "But you know what she ~really~ likes?" Now you never can tell what he's gonna say... he's a really smart guy just sometimes I wonder what he's thinking... So he says, "She likes to go into F2's room and get his underwear." F2 is like, "what did you just say????" and turns red. F1 keeps talking about it for the next few minutes. I'm sitting there just laughing and laughing and laughing - I couldn't hardly breath I was laughing so hard. Poor F2, though. He's got the whole 'cool' persona going on... that just made my day. A few other things happened, but nothing that compared to that.
That was the highlight of the evening.
Also, I'm really glad david dragged me to go study with him. I hadn't planned on starting on my philo test 'till Wed night or Thurs morning. I wouldn't have found out I'd lost my copy of the exam 'till too late to ask for another copy.
Speaking of which... My Philo teacher just responded to my email - there's no class tomorrow!
*uber stoked*
So anyway... I've got that chem test here in a few so I better start looking at it.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:53 AM :::

Tuesday, March 09, 2004 :::

Diesel Sweeties

::: posted by tinafish at 10:10 PM :::

the fun never ends

so my keys are missing.
I guess it was an omen.
*insanely peeved*
I've lost my alarm box, my truck key, my spare tire key, my gas cap key, my house key, david's apt key, and the post office box key.
On my spares I've got an alarm box, a truck key, a spare tire key, a gas cap key, and a key to my mom's house.
These are the keys BoB used to have - apparently at some point he etched BoB into the back of the alarm box.
So since the spares have no key to home or david's apt (and since my sis is out of town for the day and my dad is at his chick's) I find myself at david's... kind of. I am currently sitting in my truck outside his apt. Thanks to the awesome reach of his wireless network I am still able to chat and surf, but sadly there will be no watching SG1 for me.
I talked to BoB while I waited for my father to get to levelland w/ my spares.
I've spent the last few days talking to him a lot... more than I have in the last year.
He says he doesn't want to get in btwn david and I.
I want to say I don't want to get in btwn him and his chick.
I really want to say that... Only it's not true.
I've spent all this time wanting him to get over it... to get over me... to get over us...
I've always thought of him as a sort of security blanket. He'll always love me. I know this, and he knows this. And I will always love him. Like no matter what happens with whoever I'm seeing at the time, BoB is always there in my mind, telling me he loves me.
I want things to work out btwn me and david. With david there will not be a second chance. It's now or never, you know? He doesn't even speak to his ex, much less about her.
Maybe that's got something to do with me? I am ~very~ self-conscous about my appearance and personality. I am afraid I won't measure up to her - to his memory of her.
He says they ended badly. So did BoB and I.
I will make things work. I am learning to not take things so personally. He is a good guy.
A great guy.

::: posted by tinafish at 5:54 PM :::

oh ~so~ suave

I locked my keys in my truck.
Now I'm gonna have to wait an hour or so for my dad to get here w/ my spares.

::: posted by tinafish at 4:24 PM :::

muh shoes

so I designed these shoes on :

I made them orange to match my bag... you think maybe it's too much orange?

::: posted by tinafish at 11:50 AM :::

not a good start

my nose started bleeding while I was in the shower...

I wonder if it's some sort of omen... I mean... I have that micro test today...
hope I do alright.

maybe I should study?

::: posted by tinafish at 9:38 AM :::

Monday, March 08, 2004 :::

"fuck off bitch"

some woman messaged me just now... apparently I'm on her husband's buddy list.
Now what does that mean?
I don't know who he is. Apparently she's not familiar w/ the fact you can add someone to your list w/out them knowing you. I do admit that since it's yahoo he needed my consent... but I'll add anyone who requests.
That still doesn't mean I know him. And if this woman would check my profile she'd see that I'm ~not~ looking for a boinking.
And is it just me, but shouldn't she be asking him?
*shaking head*
I hate people who misplace the blame.

::: posted by tinafish at 3:31 PM :::

�the little shit�

rofl. my govt teacher just said that referring to his first and only child, �junior� and how junior is able to get into all sorts of trouble.
just thought that was worthy of blogging...

::: posted by tinafish at 10:13 AM :::

*uber stoked*

Bill of Leaning Towards the Dark Side is giving me **that's right ~giving~ me** a copy of Stargate on VHS.
I am ~so~ excited!!!
I watch SG1 religiously but I've never seen the movie the series is based on. It'll be nice to see how it all got started.
And someone remind me to order Season 2 of Andromeda!

::: posted by tinafish at 1:23 AM :::

Sunday, March 07, 2004 :::

these shoulders hold up so much...

I'm so tired. I just had brkfst w/ Demetrius. It was nice... I hadn't gone out w/ him in ages.
I wish I'd been in a better mood.

I'm so drained.

I'm going to bed.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:01 AM :::

why do I do this to myself?

or why do I let this happen?
I had a really rough night... I talked to the ex.
I hadn't hurt so much in a long time.
It so weird... some passing comment he made... took me back... took away all this time that I've spent "getting over" him...
And I cried.

::: posted by tinafish at 6:25 AM :::

Saturday, March 06, 2004 :::


Coronary Care Unit:
heart rhythm monitor for all patients
bedrest is the norm - you're a lucky patient if you get to use the bedside commode. most patients get a bedpan and bed baths.
cameras in all the rooms
2 patients per nurse during the day; 3, sometimes 4 at night
ventilators and balloon pumps are accepted
all drips are accepted
very sick patients; this is where other floors ship you off to when you've taken a turn for the worst

Cardiac Telemetry:
portable heart monitors for all patients
most patients are ambulatory with bathroom and shower priveledges
no cameras. nurses have pagers.
4 patients per nurse during the day; 4, 5, or 6 patients per nurse at night
only stable ventilators accepted. no ballooon pumps.
most, but not all, drips accepted
not medsurg, but not too far from it

I got pulled to E4 tonight. It's a tele floor, and they sure do things different here.
We had a code tonight. On S4 when someone codes I make a few calls - our respiratory therapist for the night and the respiratory supervisor on call, the house supervisor, the chaplain, the attending doctor and then usually a consult, medical records if the old chart isn't already on the floor, and family. Only I don't usually call the family. Usually by the time I've made it all the way through to medical records the chaplain's already on the floor and he or she will call the family.
So for the code tonight all I had to do was call the operator to announce the code overhead, and then call the attending doc. So I ended up calling the family myself. It's never fun to have to call someone's home at 0400 to tell them their loved one has made a turn for the worst.
We coded this person for about an hour, and then shipped her off to H4. H4 is ICCU - intensive coronary care unit. Really there are 3 CCU's - there's S4 (CCU), H4 (ICCU), and S8E (CICU). Then there are 2 tele floors - E4 (CTL) and S8W (CTM). We're all part of the inpatient cardiac unit.
So anyway... my friend Lus is here so I'm gonna talk w/ him for a bit.
... if this f---ing call ever stops beeping. that's another difference, btw. On S4 our monitor techs answer call lights. on E4 the unit sec does.

::: posted by tinafish at 5:17 AM :::

Friday, March 05, 2004 :::


I'm taking this sex test.

"Ever wonder exactly what's in store for your sexual future? If you're like us, you wonder.
The SexTest will tell you what kind of a lover you are, and how much of a champ (or chump) you're going to be."

it asks:
Are you a Star Trek fan?

what's that got to do with anything?

32% of all Star Trekkies are virgins.

0 of them will be female
2 of them will be male
And you will actually love 2 of them!
You have a 36% chance of dying during sex.
You are 36% sexy

::: posted by tinafish at 3:29 AM :::


I just finished Dancing Barefoot.
I like it.
I want this:

::: posted by tinafish at 3:16 AM :::

must... stay... awake...

I will do quizzes now, in an effort to stay awake.

Your a Guradien Angel! Guardien Angels are also
knows as Warrior Angels, because they are the
army of God. Not always meaning that they are
in war, simply that their job is to protect
unwary humans from dark dragons, or other evil
demons. Warrior Angels are not always friendly
with humans, but they will watch over them all
the time. Humans say that when a miracle
happens, thank your guradien angel.

What Kind of ANGEL are you? (For Girls only) This Quiz has amazingly Beautiful Pictures!
brought to you by Quizilla

Unicorns are pure....
Your a Unicorn! Unicorns are pure, innocent,
magestic creatures that have a spiraling white
horn growing out of their forehead, and a white
graceful, horses body. Unicorns represent the
sign of purity, innocence, freindship, healing,
rejeventation, and truth. Your horn is rare
prized, but you tend to be naive, lured by a
childs cry. Unicorns are reare, beautiful ans
shy mythical creatures, and you are lucky to be

What Mythical Beast are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

enough of that... for now, anyway...
I watched Mad Mad House and Tripping the Rift earlier - hence me not sleeping before work tonight. Mad Mad House looks like it's gonna be good - I still can't believe who they got rid of tonight. Well, that's not true. I kind of can. Tripping the Rift was.... I dunno.... kinda crude.
**talking to david**
His neighbor is something else.
*shaking head*
Well, I'm gonna read Dancing Barefoot.

::: posted by tinafish at 1:21 AM :::

did I mention I bought another tshirt?

I guess I did it on tuesday or so....
man, I have spent ~so~ much money this past week.
lookee look!

and totally unrelated...
I must look really good today. I mean, I've gotten hit on a lot. Well, not a lot, but certainly more than usual. Which isn't much, I admit... oh nm. All I've done is embarrass myself.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:01 AM :::

Thursday, March 04, 2004 :::

lots of things happening...

man I've had a busy day today.
I got my philo test back. He bled all over it, but I got an 88 so I can't fuss too much.
Apple called me back - said my ipod should be delivered by monday or tuesday. I'm stoked about that. I practically forgot I even own one. lol.
I talked to r00 today... I ~really~ need to ship the G3. *sigh* I don't even have a good excuse for not having done it already.
Next week is gonna be really really really busy. On Monday I've got a History quiz and a ChemLab test. Tuesday my philo test is due and I've got a MicroLab test.
Wednesday I've probably got a History quiz, and I've got a ChemLecture test.
Thursday I've got a MicroLecture test.
On the bright side I got a phone call from Sprint on my way home. Since I'm such an awesome customer they've decided to give me a 5% discount. Also they gave me the whole nighttime minutes starting at 1900, so I'm pretty stoked.
There was something else I wanted to talk about.... but I can't remember.
I'm sure I'll get to it at work.

::: posted by tinafish at 4:28 PM :::


my nose is bleeding.
I don't know why.
I want it to stop.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:01 AM :::

I thought there'd be more blood...

we just got back from watching the Passion of the Christ...
I thought there'd be more blood.
I liked the flashbacks, though. Also, when some of the stones stuck to the legs of the d00d playing Jesus, that was a small detail that made a lot of difference.

David said the movie's making him rethink some things. He also said that's not the kind of thing they teach you in Sunday School.
I'm not sure what to say to that. I mean, I was a Sunday School teacher - I taught the First Communion class. And that's what I taught my kids.

Well I'm so tired.... I don't think I'm making much sense. I'm going to bed.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:34 AM :::

Wednesday, March 03, 2004 :::

I miss my friend...

I was rummaging around in my bag... I don't even know what I was looking for anymore.
I found the chat session where Joe told me how he really felt about our friendship. I had forgotten I even printed that out.
The night we had that conv... it was weird. kinda like a death, ya know?
At first I sat there, just staring at the screen. I didn't believe what I was reading. I mean, he and I had really talked in the last 6 months or so... truth be told we hadn't spoken at all. But I never thought he and I weren't friends anymore. I was just hurt, about the way he treated me the last time we had spoken. I felt like he had betrayed me - the last time I called him I was real torn up about something going on btwn David and me. Joe had been my best friend for years... not many know me as well as he does. I really relied on him for a lot of things. When I look back now he was involved in pretty much every rltnship I'd had. His opinion always meant a lot to me... it still does. He was my sounding board for every decision I made. He was right more often than not - about what I wanted, about why I was doing things... about me. I didn't believe that kind of friendship could be ripped away from me so easily. He had said he was busy - watching a movie with his family - and that he'd call me back. If I were watching a movie with my family I'd have jumped at any reason to get away. But Joe... he got a long with his family. He loved spending time with them. For him family always came first. He used to say I was like a sister to him... that I was family. That was the last time I talked to him. He never called me back.
Then I was angry. I was sitting there and I was crying I was so angry. How could he choose to have this conv online? Didn't I at least deserve to hear it from him?
And there's the guilt. He had said he didn't like the kind of person he was when we were friends - that I treated him like an object and not a person. He was one of the most important people in my life and he said that. And he's probably right. I've never really been able to... trust? Is that the word I'm looking for? In my family growing up, whenever you made some sort of mistake, or if I confided in one of my sisters... it always came out. Trust. Sometimes I'm not sure if I know what it means.
I am alone. Funny how that's the way it turns out. I trusted BoB and he hates me now. I trusted Joe and he hates me now. Both say more or less the same thing. Joe never liked BoB... and yet they both carry the same opinion of me.
maybe I am meant to be alone?
If that is true then what am I doing with David? And why do I feel I need him so desperately?
I miss my friend.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:43 PM :::

trying out something new

thought I'd give extreme tracking a whirl.
I've also flirting with trying bravenet, since that's what nicc uses.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:58 AM :::


I was so sleepy this morning. I've really gotten used to at least 10 hours of sleep a night, but I only got 6 last night. I did ~not~ want to get out of bed.
But I do it anyway... since I did so badly on my last tests I need to do well on the next one.
Then I spend the hour or so in a commute... with all this construction and the rain it makes for a slow drive.
By the time I get here I don't really have time to look for good parking, so I end up parking out in BFE - in front of the communication building.
Then I walk across campus in the rain.
I finally make it to my class only to walk in and see CLASS HAS BEEN CANCELLED written on the board.

Why don't they email these things?

::: posted by tinafish at 9:34 AM :::

Tuesday, March 02, 2004 :::

the sweetest thing...

we�re here at ihop doing hmwrk. david�s studying for a physics quiz and I�m working on history again.
I�ve been here for about half an hour. David�s been shushing me for almost any comment I make, so I finally settled in to the dull lull that is studying with him.
He just got up, walked around the table and kissed me.

that�s gotta be one of the sweetest things he�s ever done.

::: posted by tinafish at 11:34 PM :::

Anyone know where I can get a copy of this song?

Staight Tequila:
As sung by Trini Triggs

I'm down and out on the border
She's in love up in Dallas
She says it's over I'm still thinkin' about us
Well I'm on the run with a heartache hot on my heels
So I'm stirring up feelings like booze in a blender
And pouring my heart out to love her tender
Well out on the border while she holds another tonight...


And I'm pouring straight tequila over mixed emotions
Drowning my sorrow by crying an ocean
Should I stoop to beg or just let her go
I'm in a sea confusion and I can't swim
One minute I'm fumin' then I'm crying again
Pouring straight tequila over mixed emotions tonight

A shaker of salt, a quarter of lime
Turning three finger shooters a' one at a time
Chased by a memory tonight that I can't escape
I'm down to my last buck and my last swallow
And just my luck Hey there's a worm in my bottle
But it's my last shot so here's to love on the rocks...


And I'm pouring straight tequila
over mixed emotions tonight!!!

::: posted by tinafish at 9:27 AM :::


I skipped my chem class yesterday 'cause for a reason I didn't find out 'till later my phone wasn't working... and since my "service engine soon" light came on yesterday while I was driving to school... well... I didn't want my truck to die and not have a way to call anyone.
So I left right after history, and aj followed me home.
I spent a while on the phone w/ sprint. Apparently someone called them saying they were me, that my phone had been stolen. So that's why it wasn't working. I didn't know if I'd hit my spending cap, so I paid an extra $100 yesterday morning. lol.
Since I got out of school so early, and since david didn't go to work yesterday, I ~finally~ got new tires. The ones I ended up buying were only ~ $90 each. They were the same tires I have now (well, the same as the one new one I've got), so obviously I stuck w/ firestone. Only I still have my spare on, so I've gotta get that last one bought and then I'll have a set of new tires.
I ripped my tint off yesterday. It's so annoying how its just rolled up there along the bottom. So I ripped it off and it looks so dumb. I'm gonna have to get that tinted soon - Godwilling this weekend.
I went to bed last night... oh... @ ~ 1830. So I've been asleep for a while. I better work on my hmwrk before class starts.

::: posted by tinafish at 8:21 AM :::

Monday, March 01, 2004 :::

View my Moblog

::: posted by tinafish at 4:23 PM :::

gotta rethink using USPS

I got back from school to find a package from USPS just left out on the porch.
it was only that stuff I ordered from Little Gamers but with all the hooblah that's been going on w/ the neighbor...
So I guess I'll only be using USPS when I have something shipped to my PO Box.

::: posted by tinafish at 1:02 PM :::


Dancing Barefoot shipped yesterday!
*uber stoked*

I can't wait to read it!!!

::: posted by tinafish at 8:31 AM :::