Saturday, April 29, 2006 :::

piensale duro entonces

lus came by earlier, right when I was headed out the door to meet up with the unresponsive maniac...
lus & I lounged about a bit, then went out to this small town around here called acuff - the banana pudding alone was worth the trip - mmmmmmm...
when we got back into town we stopped by hastings; I'd been wanting to try ffx since I finally finished ff7.

I saw my david there.

he had his back to me, but I knew that stand, ya know? the amt his feet were apart, the way most weight was on his left leg, how he was kinda leaning toward the right. I got all warm inside, and then I noticed that damned guiness cap.
but it was him, and I'd been dreading this moment since we broke up.
I totally got all emotional... started to feel like I was gonna vomit, yet I wanted to run over and hug/kiss him... kinda wanted to pass out, and totally wanted to run away...
but it was time, ya know? to face him. to face that part of me.
so instead of doing any of those things, I stepped back, inside myself...
and I'm glad I did, 'cause not 5 secs later some chick joins him...
and I didn't look away. I couldn't. this is now.
she slips her arms around him like I used to...
and instantly I hoped I was wrong - that it wasn't him...
but then he turned to face her, and it was that same wonderful, beautiful face I used to bask in... the same face I'll never see again.
and it was like part of me was being torn to bits... but not the part I was living in?
the part of me that I had stepped away from was throwing herself on the ground, curled up and crying...

all I did was kinda tear up and go back to looking at games.
he looks happier now, and really I am too.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:12 AM :::

Friday, April 28, 2006 :::

I've still not finished it

"Mr Reardon," said Francisco, his voice solemnly calm, "if you saw Atlas, the giant who holds the world on his shoulders, if you saw that he stood, blood running down his chest, his knees buckling, his arms trembling but still trying to hold the world aloft with the last of this strength, and the greater his effort the heavier the world bore down on his shoulders - what would you tell him to do?"

"I... don't know. What... could he do? What would you tell him?"

"To shrug."

::: posted by tinafish at 10:28 AM :::

but I thought I had nice veins

it's such a beautiful night...
I'd totally rather be in the middle of a field somewhere... wrapped in a blanket and sitting on my tailgate...
not that it's cold... just the mid 60s... and a bit of a breeze...

lounging on my tailgate, staring at the stars... that'd be nice.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:56 AM :::

Thursday, April 27, 2006 :::

jitsu is the name, jitsu is the game

so I did end up going out last night, and I had a wonderful time.
I'm not usually nervous about meeting people irl that I already know on the net, but the original bubba, in a heartwarming display of protectiveness, asked a series of questions... one of them being, "aren't you nervous?"
I said I wasn't, and it was true at the time, but as I was driving to the pour house I noticed that familiar unease... by the time I got there I was convinced the guy wasn't even gonna show, and if he did that he'd be a complete ass (this is where I flashed back to the time I had to pay the tab & walk home).
when I finally pulled into the parking lot I took a couple of deep breaths and headed in.
he did show, and he wasn't an ass, and I had a good time.

his eyes are really blue, and in the lighting, they looked silver or white.
don't get me wrong, blue's a cool color, but how awesome would it be to have silver or white irises?

::: posted by tinafish at 12:17 PM :::

Wednesday, April 26, 2006 :::

news to me

I feel it is my duty to inform you, gentle reader, that there are rules to dominoes...
aside from just matching up the number of dots, points can only be scored when the ends are a multiple of five.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:14 PM :::

it is a thin line, after all

one of my teachers in jr high used to say, "if you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always gotten."
maybe it is time for a change... since my way of doing things is obviously not working.
I've had a funky day, but watching star trek for the last 4 hours has certainly made me feel better.
think I'm gonna curl up with a book for a while...
I dream awake.

::: posted by tinafish at 2:07 AM :::

Tuesday, April 25, 2006 :::

I love pez

What Pez Are You?

::: posted by tinafish at 11:50 AM :::

(>_<)<~= D

so, btwn r00 and I, that's supposed to be a little smiley going "hadoken!"

I talked to my buddy forsaken last night... I don't talk to him near as much as I used to, and he's always got some angle on things that I've never considered before.
I date a lot. I mean, I date around a lot. I'm much happier just hanging out with some guy that I think it's cool... than committing myself to someone I think is cool. does that make any sense?
I mean... sure I talk about meeting guys all the time... and I guess that can sound like I'm just out whoring around... but if you know me, then you must know that's not true. more often than not I meet up with someone once or twice... and all other references to them come from chat convs.
anyhow.. forsaken seems to think I have problems getting attached - that the reason I date around so much is that I don't/won't/can't get attached to anyone.
and I don't think that's true...
... not problems getting attached so much as problems getting un-attached...
I'm still stuck on the guys that I did get attached to.
how lame is that?
I mean, there were reasons we split up... reasons we didn't work... and I'm still holding some sort of torch for them?
I think sometimes that I should start whoring around... that it'd make it easier?
/me sigh
I dunno wtf.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:35 AM :::

Monday, April 24, 2006 :::

the bluest sky in texas

I watched bug last night... by myself... in the dark...
and it about killed me, ya'll.
I was freaking out every time my hair touched my neck, and at one point in the movie I screamed. I mean, seriously screamed - not a gasp or a yelp, it was a scream.
/me shaking head

friday night I watched some voyager with my dad & my sis...
my dad's going to dallas again to hang out with my brother... think he's leaving sometime tomorrow.

saturday sarah and I went to see v for vendetta.
we'd been meaning to see it for a while, ever since milkdud came back here ranting & raving about how awful it was... we (sarah & I) decided immediately to watch it.
and we both liked it, and really I guess I'm just dense 'cause I couldn't [but very vaguely] relate it to current events.
after the movie we went to the pour house, and I proceeded to get ~way~ more trashed than I intended.
I did, however, manage to call irbyface. sarah & I were both very surprised that I remembered his phone number.
and we were all talking with some guy who was also sitting at the bar - I thought he was cool... 'till he asked if we were on myspace.

yesterday I mostly just lounged about watching voyager, a few episodes of naruto (which I loved), and that gross cockroach movie.
I also got to talk to one of my oldest friends - one of the girls I grew up with.
hopefully she & I can get together before too long... either when [read: if] I go back home for a while, or if she ever decides to come up here.
she sounds almost exactly the same as I remember her, which is awesome... I talked to r00 this weekend too, and he also still sounds awesome.
which made me realize just how much I miss my friends.

::: posted by tinafish at 10:28 AM :::

Sunday, April 23, 2006 :::

maybe he wasn't just trying to keep face

the first time I met irbyface he went over to my apt and had a few beers.
and got trashed.
since then I've always made fun of him being a lightweight...
he's always said it was 'cause he hadn't eaten that day...
and I never really believed him.
but last night...
only 5 drinks, over a period of at least 3 hours, kicked. my. ass.
I forgot to eat yesterday, so I guess maybe he was right.

::: posted by tinafish at 6:46 AM :::

Friday, April 21, 2006 :::

idea flavors

work has been cake today, so I've spent a while watching trailers over at apple.
and hour or so in I happened upon drawing restraint 9, which really caught my eye.

"The core idea of Drawing Restraint 9 is the relationship between self-imposed resistance and creativity, a theme it symbolically tracks through the construction and transformation of a vast sculpture of liquid Vaseline, called “The Field”, which is molded, poured, bisected and reformed on the deck of the ship over the course of the film."

my day seems to have a bjork theme - I noticed a bjork pic on depressed munkey's myspace, got an email full of celeb baby pics that had bjork in there, and then that trailer.
the movie looks interesting, so I ran a search on amazon, with no luck. I did, however, find the soundtrack... which prompted me to open itunes and give it a listen.
it's certainly different... see for yourself (Björk - The Music from Drawing Restraint 9)
think I'm gonna add it to my itunes cart... hopefully sometime soon I'll get around to actually buying all the stuff that's in there.

aside from that I've spent the day listening to those bands I loved at the easter bash - dr skoob & the acoustic groove and muchos backflips. I totally wanna dload/purchase their stuff.
I even changed my myspace profile song from stand tall, by thyrium to experiment 62, by muchos backflips.
**sorry vee!**
and I'm hungry.

::: posted by tinafish at 4:12 PM :::

Thursday, April 20, 2006 :::


tuna is delicious!

::: posted by tinafish at 9:27 PM :::

Wednesday, April 19, 2006 :::

locked up in myself

irbyface bought advent children last night...
I was supposed to go over & watch it with him, but the depressed munkey called, reminding me we'd made plans.

my dad, my sis, and I went out for dinner, and then stopped by the bookstore... when we got home she took walter for a walk around the park, and I put on some st:voyager.
2 episodes later I noticed that irbyface had called, so I called him back.
said he'd bought advent children, so I decided to finish up ff7 and then head over to his place to watch the movie.
an hour later, when I had just finished up ff7 (rawk! and sephiroth was an extremely easy kill) and was watching the ending, depressed munkey called.
so I called irbyface back to reschedule, and headed out to depressed munkey's house.

we watched equilbrium (he hadn't seen it, nor has he read any of the books I'm always saying it's a knock off of, so he seemed to like it loads) and then lounged about talking and watching conan.
he seems like an awesome guy, and I guess I'm sad things aren't really gonna work out btwn us.
but like I said, no apologies, so that's that.
I was kinda bummed when I left, though.
/me shrug

so I got home and watched another 2 episodes of st:voyager.
I just realized, right this moment, that I didn't get the last disc of season 1.
crud! that means I'm watching them out of order!
hm. netflix says I should have season 1 disc 4... I wonder if I just spazzed and put the wrong dvd in.

so anyway...
irbyface & I should be getting together tonight to watch advent children...
and hopefully we'll have some wine with it.
think I may take over some jager, and see about having some drunken soul cal 3.
I dunno... I could use a break, though.
and since my hoodie smells like smoke I'm craving a cig.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:47 PM :::

the changes make you wise

so I just got back from hanging out with the depressed munkey.
I'm gonna say I was right... when I said I guess I was wrong.
does that make any sense?
/me sigh
I dunno.
no apologies, though.
just bummed my day didn't turn out better.

::: posted by tinafish at 4:17 AM :::

Tuesday, April 18, 2006 :::

angels in the hearts of men

I've just realized
I'm having a bad day
or I think I am, anyway
it's not over, so maybe
there'll be some startling turn of events
but right this moment
I've got a madd headache
and I'm damn tired of answering the phone.

::: posted by tinafish at 3:41 PM :::

in a handbasket

so I'm not sure how this came up...
but I'm almost certain adrian just told me he thinks I'm going to hell.
this is an interesting side of him... don't think I've seen it before... but it almost makes sense to me.
seems our stances on hell can explain a lot about us.
and I wonder if I should be offended? I think it's odd, no doubt... but I'm not offended.
think I just want to find out more about what he believes...
I want to find out more about him.

I must say he's played the break up quite well. and unintentionally, I'm sure.
which seems, imo, to make it even more well played.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:29 PM :::

Monday, April 17, 2006 :::

why would he be anyone else?

lus & I were sitting out on my patio late last night...
he said something funny, and I remember thinking, 'I should use that as a post title."
but now, only a few hours later, I've completely forgotten what he said.
oh well.

I got together with the unresponsive maniac friday night... got the 512 mb ram into the new ibook... was a surprisingly easy process.
then we watched equilibrium (first time I saw it I mostly hated it, 'cause it's such a rip off of farenheit 451 & brave new world... he seemed to respond similarly) and an episode of mystery science theatre 3000 - manos: the hands of fate.
that manos movie... lol... seriously. I wanna watch it sometime, uninterrupted and all... it was... lame.
and I loved it.
s'anyway. that was fun, and as I've said before he seems like a cool guy.

saturday I was supposed to have lunch with lus & one of his friends (I'm ~really~ sad that fell through), but it ended up just me & lus having an early dinner.
we hit saigon and then stopped by his nephew's house for the computer lus had before his ibook.
so now I'm the proud owner of a g4 pwrmac... speaking of which, I've gotta paypal lus. I'm looking into getting a matching monitor for it... I'll keep you updated.
saturday evening I went over to irbyface's to watch old boy. it's an interesting movie, kinda weird, but interesting.
we stayed up talking for a bit, and then I went home.

my dad bbq'ed sunday afternoon...
and then lus & I headed out to the easter bash.
I swear, I met ~so~ many people... the highlight being that guy who was supposed to join us for lunch saturday. that fella was so... I dunno... just gave off really good vibes. seemed really relaxed with himself... content, overall. relaxed and groovy, ya know?
I didn't talk to him or anything (you know how I am around people I don't know), but I did spend a few minutes enjoying the view.
and seriously, though, lus is kinda like a minor celebrity or something... like, we got in for free 'cause apparently a few years back lus hosted this thing out at his dad's shop. so that was cool.
think he's given up booze for good, and I don't usually drink unless whoever I'm with is drinking, so we stayed completely sober the entire time we were there.
the last 2 bands that played (while we were there) were really good... dr skoob & the acoustic groove and muchos backflips (who were apparently named by some kid), so check 'em out if you ever get the chance.
the whole thing was this really warm experience, and I'm super glad we went out there.

::: posted by tinafish at 9:09 AM :::

Sunday, April 16, 2006 :::

long lost love...

oh orange juice, how I've missed you....

::: posted by tinafish at 3:54 AM :::

Friday, April 14, 2006 :::

I've come to expect it from you

so I was talking to spock is awesome about... well, about being single.
and I'm happy with it, and I don't understand how anyone could not be happy being single.
but you know... and don't get me wrong I'm not gonna go out and actually do this...
but I miss kissing.
not just a peck, and not if I don't mean it...
I miss kissing someone I love.

so now I'm bummed...
thanks spock is awesome!
/me glares in your general direction

::: posted by tinafish at 1:05 PM :::

Thursday, April 13, 2006 :::

fruited cake, hold the cockroach

I cracked open the old netflix rentals last night...
watched 2 discs of voyager while chatting with some of the guys.
irbyface, sugar lips, cronos, and the unresponsive maniac.
cronos is super cool, and I hadn't talked to him in aaaaaaages. we always talk about the weirdest things, though. lol

I'm still trying to shift my loyalties from BoB to sugar lips...
honestly I'm not sure what's going on there.
I tell my friends I love them all the time.
and no doubt I mean it, either.
but every time I tell him I love him, I get kinda nervous.
I'm not sure why I get nervous.
I wonder if it's 'cause I don't mean it... or if I mean it in a different way.
it is nice to talk with him... vaguely reminds me of how awesome talking to justin used to make me feel.
and it's nice, ya know?
nice and kinda annoying, really.
and it's not nervous to the extent that I used to feel towards adrian, which is a good thing.
/me shrug

so the guys are going on and on about how the crunchiness in fig newtons is really madagascar hissing cockroach legs.
ew. seriously. ew.

::: posted by tinafish at 1:05 PM :::

Wednesday, April 12, 2006 :::


tuttie, my ever wonderful and seemingly long lost love, is the first person to send in a pic of pepper!

I love you!

::: posted by tinafish at 8:51 PM :::

stoked and super stoked

so. I've synced my new ibook w/ .mac... that's all worked out well enough, aside from all the nicknames I use on trillian... those'll hafta be moved manually, I'm afraid.
and I pulled out the old external to see what exactly I'd managed to keep on it....
what I found was way more than I'd expected.

I expected to find at least one copy of all my music (and I did - seems I have two copies actually, for whatever reason)
and I was hoping agst hope that I had all my pictures one there.
and I do!
they're all there!
plus, and this is really awesome, I made copies of the only 2 folders I ever saved things in on my last ibook...
so ~everything~ is here.
well, no apps, so I guess not ~everything~, but it's still ~way~ better than I'd been expecting.

this little thing is gonna take some getting used to.
I mean... I'd hoped the smaller display wouldn't make too much of a difference, since it's the same resolution as my last ibook... but either I've gotten used to higher resolutions, or this is a lot smaller.
probably a little of both, to be honest.
and the drive's awful small... gonna hafta keep most things on the external for a while... dunno how I'm gonna work that out w/ my music...
we'll see.

::: posted by tinafish at 7:40 PM :::

optimus prime in a landslide

so I rushed home from work yesterday, hoping I'd find a package waiting for me on my couch.
no such luck, but no note saying they'd been by, either.
so I hung out in my sister's living room... 'till ~ 1930.

then I sucked it up and went over to adrian's.
I got pickles the panda back, and gave him a copy of the da vinci code.
he didn't look like he was in pain, and I think his new haircut suits him better than his last one did.
I stayed about 5... ~maybe~ 10 minutes.
then went back home.

guess what was waiting for me on the front door.
yes, it's true. in the 20 minutes I was gone fedex had come by.
/me sigh
so we called and asked them to hold it at the office so I could pick it up.
and I did, this morning.

it's so little... super cute...
disgustingly slow, though... I'm seriously hoping I can get the extra ram from my last ibook into this one.
it was so nice to see the apple desktop, though.
I've brought it work, along with my external drive... I'm pretty happy.

::: posted by tinafish at 12:30 PM :::

Tuesday, April 11, 2006 :::

no, fuck all

I think it's so funny whenever rob says 'fuck all'
'cause to him (and all other brits) it just means 'nothing'
but over here, it always means 'everything'
or something
like... fuck all huge means absurdly huge.
and stuff.

my ibook should be here today...
says it's "out for delivery" or whatever... if only my sister hears the doorbell!
I'll be so stoked, ya'll.
speaking of being stoked... I am decidedly un-stoked about depressed munkey's lack of communication with me.
such is life, though.

the anarchist hippie and I went out for tacos last night, and they were awesome!
we played a bit of tekken... dunno wtf but my game is sucking arse. I've seriously gotta start playing alone or something, 'cause fscking javi-er won most of the matches.
then we watched a bit of family guy... and then he went home.
I stayed up a bit longer reading, only a chapter or two, then turned out the light and waited for sleep.
it's always surprising how easily I get used to running on 3 or 4 hours of sleep... it took about an hour before I fell asleep, and then I woke up 4 hours later. I couldn't get back to sleep, so I ended up resorting to benadryl.
at least I slept, though.
didn't end up stopping by adrian's... dunno if I purposely put it off or just jumped at the idea of tacos & tekken w/ javi-er.

::: posted by tinafish at 10:42 AM :::

Monday, April 10, 2006 :::

whips and chains... handcuffs...

so mostly I like to hang out by myself on my days off, but this weekend I didn't get to play hermit.
overall I had a pretty awesome time.

friday my sis and I hung out...
talked to my mom for almost 2 hours, but I seriously didn't get to say but 5 or 10 words. she went on and on and on and on about everything that's been going on down there, and it was cool to hear about how my neices and nephews are doing, but sheesh! I've not talked to her in at least 6 months, and she doesn't ask anything about me.
I spent the entire time just saying, "uh huh" every few minutes. towards the end of the call I was just grunting occasionally.
so I was bitching to my sis about it, and we decided I deserved a milkshake for having to talk to our mother... we hit arby's for that, then stopped by blockbuster on the way back home. see, my sister's never seen doom, and we were talking about the fella in it, karl urban...
so I spent friday night reading, then talked to my mom, then my sis and I watched cinderella man and had milkshakes while watching doom.
about 0700 I crawl into bed, pretty stoked about sleeping 'till my belly button pops out.
but oh no, no long sleeps for tina.

0800 my sis comes into my room with brkfst from mcdonald's.
so I get up and end up not ever getting back to sleep.
I read another book (I actually read 3 this weekend - I'm pretty stoked) and played some more ff7.
I was determined to beat ruby weapon, even though all I'd get is [another] gold chocobo... but bragging rights ~are~ a powerful incentive.
after ruby killed me a few (read: 8) times I decided to take a break and call someone.
I had depressed munkey's number written on a napkin on my coffee table, so I decided to give him a call.
so I called, and he seemed surprised to finally hear from me, and we ended up hanging out for a while. I stopped by b&n for a couple of books (yeah... I dunno) and then to home depot for some chains (I'll explain in a sec).
I had a good time with him, and he seems like a cool guy.
I really hope we hang out again... lol... I let him borrow soul cal 3, so if it turns out I'm wrong about him I'll be kicking myself. I had the sense to keep my memory card, though, so I won't hafta start over if I end up having to repurchase the game.
we hung out 'till ~ 04 or so... was 05 by the time I got into bed.

so I slept a couple of hours then went to mass sunday morning.
those creepy guys sat in front of me again, but at least the younger one wasn't rubbing his nipples and licking his lips this week. ugh.
after mass I read another book and then called irbyface.
he got a haircut & a goatee... and was convinced we could make him look like kratos.
I had picked up a couple of 5' long chains from home depot, big heavy clunky ones. we got some tape (I suggested we use coban but he wanted to use tape) and got the chains on his arms... cut some cardboard to look like the blades of chaos... and we took a load of pics.
since I didn't sleep much I went home early to go to bed... but I couldn't sleep.
so I started reading a book - didn't finish it, though.
hopefully tonight I can get it done.

lol - one of the guys in the wireless dept just called in, asked what I was wearing, and then said he'd call me back.

::: posted by tinafish at 10:46 AM :::

Friday, April 07, 2006 :::

it would be great fun

::: posted by tinafish at 10:32 AM :::

/me dancing around in underwear

I'm having a wonderful morning, thank you for asking.
we are having some network trouble
and I've been arguing with some webtv customer for a while
plus the phones won't stop ringing
but it's not so bad
I'm still having a wonderful time
guess it's 'cause
last night
I finally beat emerald weapon!

::: posted by tinafish at 9:36 AM :::

Thursday, April 06, 2006 :::

my love affair with tuna

I love tuna.. I'm sure I've mentioned it before...
one of the ladies in the business office made some wicked tuna salad.
seriously - it was amazing.

yesterday was adrian's birthday... I sent him an icard, and I still haven't given him his gift.
things are so weird btwn us now.

night before last I hung out a bit with the unresponsive maniac - stopped by walmart, compusa, and the bookstore. I picked up a star trek book, another scifi book, and a book about ancient egypt.
then I went home to watch SVU (olivia survives with nothing but a fleshwound, although there may be some changes to the show anyway).
then irby & I hit ihop for dinner (those cinn-a-stack french toast things are awesome, btw) and then went back to his home for a bit. watched him play some graw and then we took more pics of pepper.

last night my sis & I ate strawberries, blueberries, and raspberries while watching ds9.
she's such a coot, ya'll.
like... she hates cardassians in general, damar in particular, and she's always hollering "spoonhead!" whenever there's a cardassian on screen.
and she made this [kinda gross] chili this morning... but the cornbread is great.

::: posted by tinafish at 2:47 PM :::

Wednesday, April 05, 2006 :::

about blood time, I know

I know it's just a little one, but I'm all stoked.
turns out someone else bought adrian's gun firearm, so instead of putting the money back into my savings acct I ordered another ibook.

I had all this stuff I wanted to talk about, but I've spent most of the day working on my myspace profile...
have I mentioned that I hate myspace?

::: posted by tinafish at 8:57 PM :::

Tuesday, April 04, 2006 :::


emtpy packets of pepper DOT COM is up!

.oO(well, as up as it'll be 'till someone mails in some pics of pepper)

::: posted by tinafish at 2:10 PM :::

drink some beer and watch naruto

I don't know why I'm even doing this.
/me sigh
I'm buying a firearm from adrian.
not a gun.
he needs cash and he loves that thing
so I thought I'd be nice and buy it from him,
hang on to it 'till he can buy it back from me...
and then, well, I'd give it back to him.
not what's happening.
not near what's happening.
and I'm not sure when this went from me-trying-to-be-nice to him-being-an-ass.
I mean, when it comes down to it, he did dump me.
not saying it wasn't mutual, but he did pull the trigger (keeping w/ the gun firearm theme)
don't get me wrong - I didn't offer to buy it from him to prolong our rltnship.
I know full well that he's liable to cut me out of his life... and there's nothing I can do about that.
but I was doing this because I thought he'd want it. but from the emails we've exchanged (no phone calls) he sounds... irrate. like this is a big hassle for him.
or something. I dunno.
it's like he's got that tone that mike always uses when he says "oh tina you're so pretty," meaning I just did (or that I'm fixing to do) something stupid.

I've got these loyalties...
and I don't trust often.
but sugar lips... I've got this implicit trust...
and I want him to like me.
a while back he expressed some disdain for my dating habits.
and it hurt my feelings.
I'm not sure why... 'course I'm not sure why I trust him, either.
when it comes down to it he's just some guy I used to know back about 10 years ago.
I think... maybe it's because he liked me... back when it was insulting to say that someone liked me... "ew! you like tina?"
and he did. we were kids in junior high and he gave me a necklace that meant a lot to him...
and I want him to like me. I want him to feel like he wasn't wrong?
that I'm still that same kid with the big glasses and bad hair?
he said he feels like I'm the one who got away. truth be told he was my unicorn too.
I don't think, after all this time, that anything would really come of it... but I do still want him to like me.
I've kept little things, all these years... the 27 in my screennames... it's 'cause his birthday is the day before mine... august 27th. I've still got a folder full of those little notes you write in grade school... the one where he called me sugar lips...
I don't know what I'm saying.

I had this weird dream last night...
about an emoticon serial killer.
everyone was an emoticon...
we all were.
ugh! I need to get out more

::: posted by tinafish at 12:50 PM :::

Monday, April 03, 2006 :::

fucking emerald weapon

so I spent my weekend
playing a load of ff7
I finally got a hold of final attack materia
and mega-all too
but fucking emeral weapon!
I grew final attack 'till it gave birth... so I've got 2...
looks like I'm gonna need 3, though.
I linked quadra & demi3...
and knights of the round & hp absorb...
had mimes across the board...
used a madd amt of megalixer and tried to keep wall up.
still I was shredded! like... 7 or 8 times!
think the last time I was most successful, but still I died.
think I'm gonna see about getting another final attack & another revive.

and really that's all I did this weekend.
so... if you have any suggestions on how to beat emerald weapon....
do let me know.
/me winks

::: posted by tinafish at 1:23 PM :::